Brothers of the Vine
Forever Evermore
Women of W.A.R.
It was a turbulent season of the Bachelor this year and I for one am exhausted. Not from the show itself, but from the Twitterstorm that ensued every single episode. In ancient Greece we had gladiator fights, now we have Twitter. Here are some highlights from the season below:
15. Cayla (Cayla, Caila or Kayla?) Jumping into the Pool
Cayla thought to herself, “This’ll get his attention.” and she jumped right into the pool at the first cocktail party. If you’ve seen any season of America’s Next Top Model you’d know this is a very, very bad idea. Reality TV 101, Cayla.
14. Tenille’s Walk Away
Walking away from a toxic environment? Realizing that there are better ways to be spending your time than being mercilessly bullied on national television? I don’t remember ordering this agency–but I like it. I like it a lot.
13. Cat and Sophie sharing an EX
HOW DO ALL THESE PEOPLE KNOW EACH OTHER?
12. The Three Bullies, otherwise known as The Three Witches of Macbeth
This was a pretty problematic dynamic and though we obviously tune in for the drama between contestants, this was the first time Twitter collectively said “nah” to the bullying in this show. Women hating women is real and while we expect some type of villain in the Bachie shows such as Keira, we and the girls are all aware that they’re an asshole and playing it up for the producers. But this was just too real for us.
11. Romy Leaving to Be With Her Friends
It was a real pity.
10. Brittany’s Dad
“You’re doing WHAT?!” –Brittany’s Dad approximately 6 months ago, probably.
9. Cass having a Fling With Nick Before the Season
Seriously, is there like a club of these people that meet before the show starts? Like a nightclub or a secret society just for gearing up to go on reality television? What’s the pa$$word?
8. Brittany and Cass Fighting Over Nick
Welcome to the show.
7. Brooke’s Walk Out
Yo this girl knew her worth 10/10 Google review.
6. Sophie and Jacob having more chemistry than her and Nick
“If I was Sophie right now I’d choose the brother” – says every girl in Australia #TheBachelorAU
— Josiah Shala (@JosiahShala) October 4, 2018
Would have been the plot twist of the season and an excellent Mills & Boon novel so someone get on that.
5. Nick saying “But…” A Lot
Gentlemen do not take notes.
4. Sophie’s Rejection Highlighter
This is a literal highlight–I just need someone from the Bachelor team to send me a link to that highlighter—thanks.
3. Nick not picking anyone
“So this is it?” Brittany asked icily. Ladies and gentlemen, met our new Prime Minister.
2. “Thanks for sharing…”
me to literally every woman involved in this season #TheBachelorAU pic.twitter.com/iOIeyf08GM
— Jenna Guillaume But Spooky (@JennaGuillaume) October 4, 2018
Was the last thing Nick could say before Brittany abruptly turned around and haughtily walked away from Nick and I’ve never seen a truer personification of “done” in my life.
1. Women Sticking Together
In the finale, neither Britt nor Sophie were chosen. Brittany realised in the car and mumbled under her breath, “Well that was a waste of time, wasn’t it?” Yes, Brittany, it was. Then she found out that Sophie didn’t know yet and asked to go see Sophie to check if she’s okay. She tells Sophie that he didn’t choose her either, and she didn’t want her friend to think she had “lost.”
They hug, cry and laugh together at the utter ridiculousness of this season.
This is obviously the redemption of female friendship that was absent for most of the season and is supposed to make up for the bullying earlier on. I for one would love a season of women calling out the Bachelor and Osher getting a much-needed vacation.
The next time someone incredulously asks me why I read romance I’m going to send them a link to this episode.
By Hillary Albertson