Brothers of the Vine
Forever Evermore
Women of W.A.R.
This season of The Bachelor Australia has kicked off to a WILD start. Only two weeks in and already every episode is filled with dramatic moments, many (many) make out sessions and multiple memeable moments.
To celebrate its two-week-iversary we’re counting down our top 12 most cringe-worthy moments from this season from ‘faintly awkward’ to ‘the secondhand embarrassment is so much I want to die’.
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Vakoo’s disappearance
It was a case for the FBI. WHERE WAS VAKOO AT THE SECOND COCKTAIL PARTY??
The case was solved the following episode when it was revealed that Vakoo….was unwell and missed the party. Poor Vakoo!
What made this moment particularly awkward was that it wasn’t commented upon until the episode after, where the women were made to recap the previous night’s (mis)adventures in a segment that was “definitely not wholly producer prompted” (hah).
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Ukuleles, and cheerleaders and tattoos, oh my!
Episode 2 of this season brought all the DRAMA to the table early by introducing EIGHT intruders all at once. The other women watched, shadily eating popcorn, as the Bachelor was dazzled (and confused) by a bevy of new ladies vying for his heart. We met the sultry Monique, the delightful Julia and the ever-energetic and meme-able Nikki, along with some other ladies who have since been eliminated (RIP whats-her-face and the other one). What made this moment especially cringe-worthy is that it began a turf-war between two rival gangs; the ‘new’ girls and the ‘old’ girls. Ever-ironic given we were only introduced to the ‘old’ girls one episode prior….
Look I'm no TV producer but this old girls/new girls narrative may have had slightly more effect if there had been more than 24 hours between each group's arrival #BachelorAu
— Nat Sinclair (@nat_sinclair93) August 7, 2019
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Dates on a plane
Tbh this date was kind adorable…. except that they made Matt and Monique wear khaki boiler-suits (is this 1945?) and discuss the aerodynamics of the planes. We get it Channel 10, Matt is the science-guy. Plz stop now.
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‘I’m a Gemini’
The moment that stopped the nation. This clip from the series promo rocketed around the world and made us all collectively cringe on behalf of poor Abbie and Matt.
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The orchard rendezvous
This Mills & Boon-worthy moment in the orchard was actually a little bit steamy…until Matt become a bumbling mess. As a fellow awkward mess when confronted with romantic attention I totally understood the fluster, but the second-hand cringe here made the whole thing incredibly awkward.
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Randwick Romance
Sweet sweet Elly, straight out of the pages of a rural romance novel, won the Golden Ticket date to Melbourne, Matt’s home town. But did she get an intimate walk around Matt’s Melbournian lifestyle? Meet his friends and family? Taste his usual $12 coffee from his favourite Melbourne café? Nope. She went to the tracks, rode a horse and touched a trophy. Cool.
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Enforced team sports
Some of the most cringe-worthy moments on every Bachelor season are the sports-themed dates. We all remember Keira’s infamous rant against the Kangaroo suit she wore on the boxing date. Is playing humiliating versions of team sports a necessity to finding romance?
We are all Mary here.
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Obligatory themed photoshoot.
A romance-themed photoshoot is definitely something we can get behind. But this one was just plain awkward. Why was Isabelle sleeping? Why was Helena dressed as the Black Swan but Nichole and Rachael dressed in their best Lowes flannies? Why did Mary have an outfit that made her look like a nineteenth century governess, whilst Sogand wore a slinky red number and Emma floated in the background dressed as the ghost of the Little Match Girl? Choices.
** Me @ all of these photo shoots **
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‘China girl’
Please make it stop.
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Married at First Sight
Whoever told this girl to wear a wedding dress to the red carpet is an evil genius. Extra cringe for Matt thinking her bridesmaid was also a contestant, and that Rachael had to wear that outfit for the whole cocktail party.
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The broken rose
Definitely foreboding for Nichole and Matt’s romantic future. 99% cringe. Topped only by one thing.
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A walkout?!
Despite ALREADY having a rose (see incident above) Nichole stormed out of the cocktail party with the iconic line “SHE’S JUST A BLONDE F*CKING B*TCH WITH A TAN. Like, I’m over it.”
She was then caught having a sneaky powwow with Rachael over a fence. The only question is why? Did she actually walk out? Does she not notice that she is ALSO blonde and tanned? Why have the powwow at the fence (was it nearer the cheese?). Many questions. Much cringe.
So keen for the rest of this hot mess of a season to continue!