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The Highs and Lows of Pooch Perfect

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The Highs and Lows of Pooch Perfect

Oh my dog!! It’s finally here and it’s the show we have all been waiting for. It’s the Great Australian Bake Off. No, wait, they have just borrowed the warehouse and location, made it look like a giant doghouse and replaced Maggie Beer and Matt Moran with Rebel Wilson and Russell the dog.

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Now, in case anyone is wondering why Rebel Wilson is the hosting a dog grooming show, let’s just cast our minds back to when she played a giant cat and there is your answer. What better way to get over that car crash of a movie than backing it up hosting a dog show with a dog as your co-host?

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HERE.WE.GO.POOCHES. Tonight 7.30 #PoochPerfect

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I will admit I secretly love the dog show world. My mother-in-law is a prominent dog breeder and she has also showed and won a multitude of awards. Crufts, anyone? So I’ve been lucky enough to have small glimpses into this world over the years, and the incredible love, support and passion people in this world share.

In a world where Coronavirus, droughts, floods and bushfires has dominated the headlines and various terrible reality TV shows have redefined the absolute worst in behaviour, Pooch Perfect is the antidote. We are all here for the dogs and even a little bit of drama, so release the baboons – I mean hounds!!!

The Highs

  • Rebel Wilson’s seriously shady dog jokes – and accompanying side eye.

  • I’m already sensing some tension in the teams and here’s hoping for something that is a cross between MAFS dinner parties and Best in Show the movie with the high stakes of Lego Masters. Shayla and Chris, I’m looking at you.
  • The absolutely adorable dogs, and their owners’ delight when they see their dogs after their makeovers. I would have loved to have been the one to write the casting-call requirements for this show.
  • The dog walk – there was plenty of bedazzling going on, paired with bows, doilies, ribbons and a lot of big hair. And that was just the judges!!
  • One of the dog’s final looks was a flashback to my younger sister from years ago, complete with hair in side scrunchy, legwarmers and the don’t-touch-me attitude to match. Eleven-year-old girl – nailed it!!
  • Lolly the Labradoodle – what can I say? She looked every bit the show-queen princess.
  • When Rebel referred to one of the dog stylists as Prisoner’s Bea Smith of dog groomers. Let’s hope she doesn’t style like Bea Smith.
  • When multiple dogs came out looking like they had been styled by Bjork, Lady Gaga and Nicki Minaj for the Met Gala red carpet.
  • My mother-in-law Lorraine’s best moment, which I promised to include, was when the one-eyed rescue dog stole the show.

The Lows

  • Shayla’s treatment of her husband was just a little awkward. The poor man was not allowed to talk, move or breathe. Basically a statue of her husband would still have annoyed her.
  • When we realise one team has to go home and it’s likely going to be the one that didn’t have time to put a bow on the dog.

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Talk about a glow up ✨ #PoochPerfect

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What the F*? moments

  • When Rebel pulled the statue out of the bag and literally ripped it from its base, breaking it in half. Thank goodness she didn’t accept Brad Pitt’s BAFTA award
  • When Jacqui said she became a stylist because her partner cheated on her. Revenge is clearly served while styling unruly pooches. She also had a mini meltdown when scissors were not forthcoming as the judges came in – not really sure why she couldn’t just pull the drawer open. But in fairness we all secretly have that drawer at home that is impossible to find scissors in when you need them, and I would be bawling too. Could be under a potato masher or every Christmas and birthday card everyone has ever given me. She was probably right not to even try.
  • Judge Colin Taylor’s awkward throw-away comment to Amber about her multiple facelifts. I mean we don’t really know if she was mad, sad or surprised by that sassy comment because her face didn’t move. I’m sure she was trying to scowl as best she could.

By Sarana Behan
Image via Channel 7

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