Kellie McCourt, author of Murder Most Fancy, dropped by the blog to review new Australian movie How to Please a Woman
I think I’m quite liberal, but as I sat watching How to Please a Woman in the cinema I found myself glancing sideways at my married girlfriend, somewhat scandalised, whispering, ‘Wow, they’re really going there?!’
Sex. Do we talk about what we need from it, what we want from it and the bits that really, we could live without, enough? Probably not. I was going to say, ‘That’s astonishing! It’s 2022!’, but it’s been a problematic year for women’s rights, so maybe this is another place we need to keep the pressure up. Or down. Or in concentric circles. Lady’s choice.
Why is talk about sexual desire, preferences and tastes in women 40+ so taboo? So shocking?
My theory? We’re just not practised at it. If we had more conversations about sex with our friends, we’d probably have more conversations about what we want (before, during and after), with the people we’re having it with. Surely this would lead to better sex and more orgasms? It feels like there’s very little downside here.
I asked one of the film’s producers, Judi Levine, and she agreed: ‘There’s nothing more gratifying than laughing out loud, sharing intimate secrets, and seeing something that sparks joyous and informative conversation.’
Watching this movie in a theatre full of women it also became apparent from the spontaneous, simultaneous nodding, laughing and eyerolling that we all think in surprisingly similar ways about a great many things. For example:
- Unless he’s Brad, if a random guy turns up at your front door offering a choice between sex and doing your weekly/fortnightly/monthly/bimonthly (no judgement) clean he’s going to end up with a mop in his hand (preferably while you have a beverage in yours).
- If, however, he’s Brad-ish and his primary goal is How to Please a Woman instead of How to Please Himself, we might take pause.
- If his primary goal is How to Please a Woman instead of How to Please Himself, and he knows what he’s doing (i.e. has undergone some professional training by a women 40+ and is now rocking some five-star verified moves), that bathroom floor might keep another week.
- If 2 & 3 apply and he’s also keen to take instruction and enthusiastically implement it, then I think we can all agree, no one really looks at the kitchen floors that closely. And germs are quite good for you.
- And, if I make take a liberty and speak on behalf of ALL women, if he makes that house spotless first, and then implements 2, 3 & 4, well ladies, some mind-blowing stuff is about to go down. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t know a single woman (over 40, under 40, married, single, gay, pink with purple spots) who isn’t more comfortable, confident, adventurous, energetic and generally enjoys sex more, when making love in a freshly cleaned house.
How to Please a Woman is also a gorgeous story about female friendships, how it feels to get professionally older in a world full of ever younger, ever seemingly more qualified people, what it feels like to be lonely while in the same room as your partner, and realising the immense value of your life experiences and yourself, wrinkles or no.
So, if you’re looking for a movie for girl’s night, treat yourself. It’s 2022, and it’s about time we cleaned up.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Kellie McCourt
Kellie McCourt has worked as a national and international television anchor, scriptwriter, producer and reporter. Kellie is also an experienced print journalist and magazine editor.
She has a double BA in Journalism and Creative Writing from Curtin University, studied journalism in SE Asia and completed a postgrad scholarship program at UNSW. Alas, her mother is still waiting for her to ‘get a real job’, like a lawyer. Or an accountant.
Kellie had a misspent youth as a wayward socialite, and loves shoes, friends, reading, shoes and baked goods.
Kellie is passionate about creating entertaining, gender empowering stories. She lives in Sydney with her two amazing young daughters, and two poodles.